Sobering Reflection

Perhaps nothing is as sobering as death. Yesterday I attended the funeral of my uncle on my Mom's side of the family. Jesse Lee Smith. Not even a year ago his wife, my aunt Carolyn, died. He did not even live a year after Carolyn's death.

As the family walked through the service and interment a particular Psalm assaulted my sense of youth and vigor: Psalm 39.

Psalm 39:4-6 "O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am!
Behold, you have made my days a few hand breadths, and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath!
Surely man goes about as a shadow! Surely for nothing they are in turmoil; man heaps up wealth and does not know who will gather!"

For some reason I, and perhaps many my age (30 somethings), tend to approach life as if the next day is a fore gone conclusion. I assume tomorrow.

I am not a negative person and I don't want people to think I'm being negative. I'm not. I'm just trying to bend my life around truth.

The truth is that I am a blip on the radar screen of history, and I am a very minute blip at that. The truth is that I am going to die. The truth is that knowing that my end is sure and that my days are short in history has a sobering effect, but it also has a profound effect.

David prays to know his end for a reason: to protect him from wasting his life in turmoil that comes as a result of accumulating much wealth.

David wants to live wisely, not foolishly. I'm not sure he pulled that off, but kudos for caring and giving it a whirl.

I'm not sure most of us even care enough to even try that avenue. I know I don't.

Maybe I do now.

The truth is I can feel great today and discover I have massive cancer issues tomorrow and be dead in six weeks.

If this is the case, and I really assimilate this possibility, it could prevent me from wasting my life.

It is truly a waste to work in order to accumulate stuff and all of the resulting work to maintain stuff when my days are few and then my stuff gets passed on to someone else that did not work for it.

I believe the point of Psalm 39:4-6 is to keep us from wasting our lives.

The truth is that I could be buried in a few weeks. The truth is I have a limited time here before my appointed day comes. The truth is that I don't want to waste the time I have (this is due to God's grace to me not my being good; I'm a scoundrel).

All of life is not intended to be "happy place" time. Good and productive living has to contain sobering moments that push us to action.

Yesterday was such a day for me. My day is coming and when it approaches I'm quite sure I'll look back and wonder where it all went so fast.

I don't want to have to wish I had done something that lasted beyond my days. I want to look back and say, "Jolly, you failed a lot; you really screwed a few things up good; you were far from perfect, heck even good; however, you did all you could with what you were given as best you could and you did not waste life on getting and keeping more stuff."

Plainly I want to get to the end and return my one talent to Father with whatever is gained from using that talent in his service. I don't want to just return the talent that I hid because I was too busy doing stuff that did not put Father's resources to work. I fear that.

I want to hear, "Well done. Enter the joy of your Master."

O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am!